Friday, December 31, 2010

Red Mark After Waxing

detergent cocktails

Sun Here speaks Mortimer. Yes, he speaks. He dictated the little pudding head - or as it is now affectionately called: Plüschkimo - just a little. I'm for writing that is too lazy and quite honestly, I meet with my alligator slippers do not have the correct keys. Unfortunately, I have learned this lesson only after the hard way, through love mails to a beautiful lady crocodile in Australia, which has seen the odd typo as a personal affront. Ah, women ... But
to women should not go in my little annual review, at least not to any amorous adventures do not, because I am a gentleman so, no. I just did not. What a dry spell!

Maybe I should speak up once again on things ... oh, how was it? Hm, probably is not such a good idea if I did not even retain its name. Gee whiz. My love life is uneventful. And that was somehow the last year. Can I even talk about the last year, although it is not over? Oh, never mind ... Since when I'll cling to the conventions?

So what happened in 2010? Let me think ... Hm .. Ah, well ... Oh, that was the year before. But the ... Yes, that you will like, who have anecdotes of drooling cats, the socks on his head who always ... Damn, that happened three years ago. I see one in my life, there is no power! How tragic!

Only Fremdtüdelü. But so I'm also busy enough. Exactly, I have no time for her own life, I better be there for others. I am a Samaritan, yes, exactly. The Holy Mortimer! I built the temple sacrifices, altars, and my house crocodile [here breaks off this looming Megalomanieanfall. I have indeed tired of the nonsense of this (hopefully) be open crocodile down. Friendship and Mitbewohnermortimerliebe has also come to an end. At least for me. Perhaps this was also a Mortimerjahresendzeitanfall or Marple has the ignorant again mixed a few cocktails detergent, then comes into his head a lot of chaos, by the Blubberblasen. This is now not a sentimental annual review, even if I had to tell enough, in exceptional cases of a positive nature. That's what I get for you. In the next year. See you in 2011 but again, right? OR? Concerns me is not lost, yes? I would sorely miss her yet.]

Michael Peters Beat It Jacket

snow, Ahoy



Viel Musik und wenig Worte; mit einem herzlichen Abschieds- und einem ent­spannten Willkommens-Ahoi winke ich mitten im Schnee in beide Jahres­rich­tungen. Später werde ich eine Wunder­kerze abbrennen, ein kleiner Moment ganz für mich alleine, das mach ich immer so. Gute Vorsätze hab ich keine, und in einer Neujahrsmail die ich heute bekommen habe, stand in robusten Worten auch eine schöne Erklärung dafür: "Der Beginn eines Jahres ist kein kranker, oller Gaul, den man nach Belieben beladen kann. Davon bricht er garantiert zusammen." Irgendwie ein schönes Bild. In diesem Sinne wünsche ich euch allen einen prima Jahreswechsel, ohne den Ballast großer Erwartungen, und hier kommt nun Schneelaunen-Musik...
Some music and only a few words; with a warm farewell- and a relaxed welcome­ahoy I wave to both directions of new years eve. Later I will burn a sparkler, one moment all by myself,  like every year. I don't have any resolutions, and in a new years mail I got this morning I found a quite fittingly explanation for this, in tough words: "The beginning aof a new year isn't an old and sick hack, which can be loaded at one's convenience. That will surely let him collapse." A strong imagination.With this in mind I wish a wonderful new years eve to all of you, without being ballasted with too many expectations. And here's some snow-mood-music...
























Thursday, December 23, 2010

How Much Sugar In A Package Of Vanilla Sugar

Merry Christmas - Merry Christmas

With us now the winter has returned. There was not much snow, but after it was little more than 0 degrees, remained few inches a week are. For the weekend should there be a supply, just in time to have white Christmas.
Winter also visited our area. There was not a whole lot of snow, however, since temperatures stayed around 32 degrees those couple inches did not leave right away. There is more snow supposed to come over the weekend. Just in time for a White Christmas.



















went on my first day off we are to the park, however, was closed by the snow-covered road yet.
On my first day off we went to the park. Unfortunately it was closed because of the snow.


was a few days later but then it is no longer a problem. The pond / lake is frozen and you could still see marks on the ice. Otherwise, it was there but very quiet. There were no ducks or other birds to see which normally cavort there only pretending.
A few days later that was no problem anymore. The pond / lake is still frozen with some animal tracks on the ice. Otherwise it was very quiet there. No birds or ducks that are there usually in large amounts.




















My son busy at work: He had the Christmas tree with the sled to bring home:)
My hard working son: he had to bring the Christmas tree home using his sled:)















I hereby would like to all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year 2011 wish!

Merry Christmas to everyone and a Happy New Year!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Purple Monster Sesame Street

I can this idiot does not suffer!

"I can not stand this jerk!" Complains Mortimer.

"I've heard," it comes from the next room.

"If you are, you Saftsa"

I stop his curse attack. "Mortimer!"

"What? This pompous little poison dwarf strikes me stop on my nerves. What makes the really here? "

I told him 1021 times already, but then I say it just still a 1022 times," he writes. He is a writer and "

" Pfft, writer. For three days, the feather duster is here and he has written a single word "

" First: I am not a feather duster, but a pen mouse, "Dimitri roars through half the house." Secondly, all spring mice by nature writers them namely ink flows through the veins and third, I was writing in the Head, you reptile level free! And why am I here? Because I need a rest, but constantly around you moserst, you are never still! Never! Even when you sleep, you sound like a broken jet. I can not work! "Dimitri waddled into the room. Why does not he fly, I do not know. Perhaps the shock mice do not, after all there are only distant relatives of the bat, probably makes it difficult to ink blood and I will not risk offending the little fur ball. Therefore, I wonder in silence.

Mortimer is built up. "You can not work? Bad luck! I can not live! "

turn Suddenly both to me and say, simultaneously: "Now you say but also something"

And I do. "You're talking garbage! Leave me alone! "

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Put Over The Maternal Knee

chain saw Bambi

restless rustling, the süßlichschwere popcorn smell in the air, residents, past press to kick you on your toes, awkward, possibly with sadistic intent, which I most insinuating not once but when drilling in her heels my feet. Slide over to ram you while your heavy bag even in the face. Although there is a whole array of seats are like little battered scouts lined up that are still free, but for some reason, I assume, at least, there is a reason it must be just these places. Perhaps happy memories attached to them, the first kiss, a particularly artistic nose fountain of blood or a Popcornweitwerfrekord what you find just so beautiful, maybe it is due to a compulsive disorder, perhaps they wanted but only a few people squirm and get rid of their aggression, for foreign feet, faces, before it starts.

It is dark, the curtain opens, commercials, trailers fibrillation and finally appeared on the first flat-ironed actors, women who wake up with perfect hair flutter, not a zerfilzten Bird's nest, and not look like they could have pulled the last night by a coyote a few thorn bushes, like normal people. Ok, as I do. The dialogue is polished, no jolts, no word finding problems and if so, which falls into a similar category as Filmtollpatschigkeit, on the screen well, even this seems cute, little to no Heulfluchen. And at some point it comes in these Hollywoodrosakitschfilmchen there's always this scene in which the impressive music aufblubbert in the background and two überhübschte actors are suddenly see with different eyes, sparkling colored contact lenses suddenly and see two last, what viewers have been the bias knew - that they belong together and collapsed into his arms. The audience then facilitating sigh, finally, these small flash flag strapped it, sometimes a bit of celluloid liquid trickling from his eyes, ah, there will be a happy ending. Everyone is happy. Moooment, not all. Who are you listening "Wow, what a crappy unrealistic," muttered and rolled his eyes theatrically? Oh yes, that was me.

Hollywoodschnulztourette, I liked to call it and I do not mind if this violin droning begins to gather itself, the Oh-Nee-curses in my brain pool, waiting for the kitsch of flooding and the subsequent eye roll flooding. My friends and acquaintances wanted to cure me with a romantic comedy after another heavy by the disorder, but they made it much worse. For a while I was, therefore, because of my Hollywoodschnulztourette, decried as hopelessly unromantic. Now everything is good. No, I have not been overcome. I have changed my friends and acquaintances. And honestly, I really have nothing against love stories, even the Hollywood version, I see from me and on, but only with people who do not find it bad that this überidealisierten romances are not what I mean by love, me labeling them as funny or romantic. That's me that is not, at least not unromantic. Funny? Yes, definitely. We're among us and you do not further betray determined, a bit of romance lies in me, all the hard variety, correctly, the hopeless, but I let it not so often out and if they do, they may only be a windproof mask of cynicism play, the little moon child. Until now.

And now I have you.

you.

And everything is different. Everything happened very quickly.

no choirs of angels, pathetic stuff, but plenty of sparks that I could not initially explain bit and because what just happened, we knew that, I think both are not. But now we are here.

you and me.

And the moon child suddenly has much more space, it can no longer be locked up and I do not even want, I need not hide it anymore. Because you are here now and all is suddenly well.
Not a bit like in the movie, it has quirks, but so it is perfect in my eyes.

I think I am going to the movies again, and when the credits roll, I'll grin happy to see over to you and just say one more thing: "You? Our history is beautiful, or "

" Hm, "You will smile. "And it's not too late."

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Stomach Flu Medication

And the only proper response is: "That bitch"

You remember perhaps Marple. Marple, the charming Häkelpuppe that I was given before two years ago and since then in my book shelf lives, dreams of writing a book on submerged peoples and should Mortimer teach a few weeks ago poker (which ended in disaster, but that is another story. With a lot of jelly scares and bruises, has forbidden me to Mortimer in depth.) Marple has never been particularly quick-tempered, so here, but never the little Häkelpuppe was aware of their own coolness without ever seem arrogant and everyone who was only two minutes with her in a room, noticed that the Unglaublichkeitsfaktor and the internal balance of each individual fiber of her body woolen light. She was not nervous, clumsy, distracted, or permanently confused. In short: It was not a bit like me.
But now they no longer sparkles, not their Kullerknopfaugen shine. Marple is sad.

"Mortimer, what's the matter with Marple?

" Oh, have you not heard? "Mortimer looks at me, waiting for my reaction. Well, obviously I've heard it yet, but for his sake shake I short head. "She's been sizzling."

"Huh? Who is ready to hiss? Marple?

"No, no Marple," he says in that tone that you use only for particularly slow-witted specimens of humanity to which category I belong admittedly often. Slowly and deliberately he speaks the words. "Gruselda has left them."

"Seriously?" I ask and throw the poor Marple a worried look. "But that had not yet long together. A maximum of three weeks. "

" When did your ever prevented a separation? Yesterday, the separation, now has . They had got a new "

And the only proper response is to:"? That bitch "*

" Do you have to yell like that, "Mortimer hisses at me.

"I'm so sorry, but it's true after all. How can such a stupid Porzellanpuppenkuh with a face that teaches children to fear and a personality that looks like it's even more frightening to think that they can find someone who is better than our Marple?

I stand up. "Where you going?"

"Marple comfort, of course."

"This is a bad idea."

"How so? She's so sad. "

" It is not comforting is the problem, but that you want to do that. "

" What? Do you doubt my abilities consolation, or what? I can do well, you little poison dwarf. "

" Have you ever been lovesick? "

" You know well that I had. "

" And what would you have done if someone who has just fallen in love and is able to do anything as stupid rays "

" Hello? Where's still "

" What? You stupid shine, but it suits you. But I must retell? Well, if you in those moments someone geglotzt with permanent smile on your face and had tried to cheer up, what would you have done? "

Think of balancing acts on the window sill, like barbed wire hugs and uplifting scenarios. "Ok, I understand your point. But what do we do now? "

Mortimer pulls himself together. "I scold Marple on the women's world, you bring the vodka."

* Whatever goes: " Do you have a pitchfork? Or a baseball bat? In a pinch I take the rolling pin! "

Monday, December 6, 2010

El Cajon Westfield Mall

! And Stay away from my bubble

"Say, when are you talking about me again?"

Mortimer turns his back to me.

"Just so I can schedule it. At least a little bit. You know, I like it quiet, but if you do not even meckerst for hours, then it makes me uneasy. "

No response.

"So, how long? A few more minutes? A few days? Any longer? "Silence. "Oh, Mortimer, I'm still sorry that I asked you that, it was a joke. You are also sensitive. "

Quickly he turns around. "I'm sensitive? I "Yes, you, my dear house crocodile. Yes, you "You asked not only whether I am incontinent. Which of course in itself bad enough, because you know how sensitive I respond to comments about my sensitive bladder, have you even twittered yet. "

" I'm sorry, I did not think properly. "

"I believe you now," he says. "What? You are totally absent lately. Even more than usual and I could swear that's not worse. "

"So bad I'm not."

"I must remind you where you have your scarf found yesterday?" No. "In the fridge. And constantly grinning du Constantly! Marple says, it does something only love. I think you're possessed by a demon plush. "

" Mortimer, you're not but maybe a little jealous? "

" Huh? Why? Because your phone calls for hours, typing messages and longing in the middle of the night, wake up, because he's wrong? And that you (as a teen), lost in thought throughout Luv hinmalst? And you never did that for me? "

" Yes. "

" Nope, that's all right. This is a great guy and I am quite satisfied that he picks me up a bit. You are namely quite exhausting, you know? "

" I know, "I say. "So now everything is back to normal?"

"Yes, but if you like me to Geturtel about banning some point in the store, we renegotiate, Miss - and fingers away from my bubble